Thursday, 27 February 2014

Most Times An Asshole is Just a Asshole - Not Everyone Who Has Wronged You is a Psychopath

If you are the kind of person who see 'psychopaths' everywhere, and all, or most of your exs are "psychopaths" - then it is YOU who are the problem I am sorry to say. Spoilt brat...professional victim...hysterical drama queen? How about putting one of those labels you love to throw at everyone else back at yourself for a change? You might well be the disordered one, not the people who came into your life unwilling to live up to every expectation you had of them. You could be an incredibly boring person and your 'psychopaths' had enough of you? Does this make them 'pure evil' and then worthy of wasting your life away on a 'recovery' forum filled more fruitcakes, flakes and nuts than in a health food store? So please grow up and stop throwing 'get out of personal responsibility' cards around.

Be Fair, Emotionally Neutral and Be Honest with Yourself 

I cannot stress enough that one should not declare a person to be a "psychopath" unless you are completely sure you have fairly and honestly evaluated them with as much emotional neutrality as possible. The label "psychopath" is essentially stating that they are not a proper human being. Putting this tag on anyone—no matter much they may have wronged you—must not be taken lightly. 

A psychopath is the human psychological version of a tapeworm. It gets inside a person, family, organisation, workplace, company or government and feeds on the energy of the normal people around "it" depriving them of their sense of self and their emotional/psychological and often financial security. Even so, not every lowlife and manipulator is a psychopath. Most times a creep is just that, a creep. Not every person who makes our lives miserable, acts like a creep, a serial womaniser, gets elected, runs a major corporation or engages in criminal activities is a psychopath.  

In the early days of recovery from an encounter it can become only too convenient to claim that anyone who has ever wronged you is or was a psychopath. We must bear in mind that over ninety-five percent of the human race are not psychopaths. A good number of these people have done selfish, bad and nasty things in their lives, but they are still not psychopaths because they still retain the desire for redemption. Most of this would be down to immaturity and old fashioned stupidity, not planned and purposeful gaslighting and manipulation. 

Psychopaths are no more than 4% of the population (mainly in the business and politics), and as low as 1% in most of society as a whole. However, the damage and misery they inflict on others is enormous so they can seem to be everywhere. Most people you will meet will mean you no harm, nor have any desire to exploit, manipulate, hurt, damage, gaslight or use you. Keep this in mind. However, people who have been genuinely affected by a psychopath who passed through their lives know precisely what they were dealing with after a period inner reflection/revelation/discoveries in the aftermath and they have no doubts they were dealing with a psychopath all the time—but never came fully to terms with it until it was too late. These sincere victims need support and understanding and not to be judged or told to "get over it!" or worse still "you bought this all on yourself..." Worse still, forced via some 'recovery' forum (were the real identities of the administrators are hidden) to end up blaming all the problems they ever had in life on, you guessed it..."PSYCHOPATHS!!!!!!!!"

Life is really good once we understand and then seek to transcend the Psychopathic Control Grid. It is almost like being reborn a wiser, mature and a more complete person. What happens to the psychopath who damaged you is no concern of yours. They are history and never coming back. 


No contact also applies to toxic or negative people whom you can't be comfortable around, including PROFESSIONAL VICTIMS and Trauma Vampires who will drain the life energy out of you. Being around these people has serious health implications. Our time on this planet is short. Your job is to look after yourself and find the countless millions of wonderful people out there to share your life with. They are waiting for you. So stay positive, friendly and wise. 

The painting at the top of this post was inspired by a neighbour of mine who was recovering from cancer and everyday I watched her walk a slightly longer distance up the road until one day she was well enough to reach the crossroads at the end of the village. I found her so inspiring and discovered so much from this ordinary woman of what the human spirit is capable of overcoming. She did it without listening constantly to a wealthy, white-bread neurotic who never had a day of hardship in its life screaming '!" while holding a teddy bear on a 'recovery' forum.


and it doesn't make them 'psychopaths!!!!!!!' if they get sick of the sight of you and your endless whinging either. You are neither infallible, nor as precious as you have deluded yourself into thinking you are. DEAL WITH IT.

The real dangerous psychopaths out there are loving the histrionic distraction and the confusion/mass hysteria you are creating by trying to get back at your ex Husband/Boyfriends. You are making it easier for the real deal to hide and prey in big business and politics. Where we are all targets.

These are the ones we really need to be concerned about. Not you posting photos your ex 'Narc' from Facebook who has long forgotten about you (surprise, surprise...) and moved on with their lives. Maybe there is a lesson in this for you too?

Thomas Sheridan is an independent alternative artist, author, satirist, musician, public speaker, broadcaster and researcher currently based in the West of Ireland. His illustrations have appeared on the covers of newsstand magazines, books and websites worldwide. 

The Anvil of the Psyche is considered a vital manual for personal and social survival in a world controlled by greed and false hopes. Thomas' writings and interviews have evolutionised people to build a firewall around their own psyche and not to be lured into handing over personal independence to an exterior collective or guru. As a result, his NO CONTACT EVER AGAIN philosophy applied to controlling individuals and groups has made Thomas an enemy of mind-controlled death cults and neo-Nazi fringe groups.  Thomas has also been featured in several films and documentaries. 

1 comment:

  1. Regarding ''recovery forums'', you are very right to assert they can be dangerous or at least misleading. Initially appearing as ''safe havens'' from nastiness and unfair judgement, they reveal an almost militant side, almost sect-like behaviour. While the claim is to make the individual matter and focus on supporting everyone unconditionally, the attitude is ''toe the line or get out; you don't deserve to be here'' from some mods. I have seen a member pressured into making a decision regarding her partner and even shamed for not doing so, as if she owed an explanation to an internet group she was visiting anonymously. She was seen as inferior for being confused, reluctant to take action (about her own life), and was told off for not informing correctly regarding her ''no contact'' time. She was told to reset the no contact counter and start over as she had been dishonest; it reminded me of a school scolding.This was an adult whose decisions did not affect others on the platform, yet was made to feel like she should be held accountable by them and could be a bad influence. At that point I felt like I'd joined the Moonies; it was completely ridiculous, yet no one noticed the absurdity and patronising attitude; many agreed with the moderator, who had a chip on his/her shoulder and superiority complex about ''working so hard'' to maintain no contact, something the questioned member ''didn't seem willing to do''. It was like saying ''you're not one of us''. Never had I imagined even abuse recovery could be turned into a competition.

    You are drawn in by unconditional acceptance; you get comfortable, but then end up having to report back as you would to a probation officer, if you want to return to that environment. I believe most people there are genuinely in need of non-txic communication and are very vulnerable, whilst others genuinely intend to comfort, but they are all in the wrong place. I can't say this happens all the time; I've only seen it once, but once was enough to creep me out and send me running. Also, one can be banned without warning, losing access to the very sensitive information they'd been encouraged to reveal; they are left permanently unable to remove it from public view. This is very dangerous and unfair.

    It was a strange to say the least. Further proof people should keep their guard up and stop pouring out private information to just anybody. From experience, I totally agree with your approach of enhancing one's awareness instead of group activism, which usually ends up being controlled by the wrong people. It seems that any type of group, even based on abuse recovery, ultimately wants to mould you into a standardised member instead of accepting you as an individual.